The Power of the Tongue by Lois Taylor

I met Lois Taylor many years ago at America’s Keswick Pastor’s Conference in Whiting, NJ. Lois and her husband have endured some very difficult trials in their lives, yet they have remained faithful to God and His calling on their lives. I am extremely blessed to know this dear lady, who is indeed a woman of wisdom. I am sure that you will be encouraged by her words of wisdom and her sweet and humble spirit.

The Power of the Tongue by Lois Taylor

God blessed me with a mentor right in my home as I grew up. My mother was a Godly woman.  She loved the Lord, with her heart, soul, and mind. She was a woman of prayer and God’s Word was her companion. It is because of her example lived before me, that as a teen I decided my goal was to become the Godly woman described in I Peter 3:3-4, “Beauty should not be from outward adornment….Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.”

As a youth I had trouble with my tongue, it could be sharp, cutting, and hurtful.  Mom would send me to my room to read the book of James. I learned the power of a tongue (James 3:1-12). Its power can be as dangerous as a spark that starts a raging forest fire or its power can be used to gently steer a stallion.   Just as a rudder can steer a ship into safety or danger, a spoken word can bring trust or distrust, forgiveness or bitterness, peace or anxiety.

Proverbs has much to say about the tongue. One of my favorites is “A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver” Proverbs 25:11 (NASV). Since my kitchen decor is apples, my husband and I have talked about having those words traced on our wall. As precious as silver and gold are, words coming from Godly wisdom are even more precious. In Proverbs 8, wisdom speaks: worthy things, what is right, true and just. Wisdom gives instruction and knowledge which is to be valued and chosen over gold or silver and it becomes the well from which our words spring.

Proverbs 18:21 tells us “the tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit.” The meaning of those words puzzled me. Psalms 52:1-4 aids with the explanation. “The tongue which plots destruction is like a sharpened razor, it speaks harmfully and deceitfully and will be brought to everlasting ruin.” That ruin is death, which is the fruit of a destructive tongue.

In contrast to that, Proverbs 13:3a says that “He who guards his mouth, guards his life.” Proverbs 15:4a calls a wholesome tongue a tree of life. While the fruit of loving an evil tongue is destruction, the fruit of a loving, gentle, wise tongue is life and health. (Proverbs 12:18b)

Further in chapter 25 of Proverbs we read these words, (11) “Through patience a ruler can be persuaded, and a gentle tongue can break a bone. Honestly the first time I read that verse while working on this writing, I skimmed over the word gentle. Instead I read it as “the hurtful tongue could break a bone.” In that negative context the saying we yelled as kids came to mind. “Sticks and stones can break my bones, but names can never hurt me.” I do not know the source of those words; I think some parent thought it was a way of giving their child an alternative to handling a situation without a fist fight. But there is no truth to the words, “names can never hurt me.” I know how hurtful name calling was when I was a child. To this day I cringe when I think of some of the names I was called. In reality the tongue can be emotionally and mentally very hurtful. The pain can be as painful as the physical pain of a broken bone.

If that verse had said an evil tongue, that would have been a good explanation.  But, that is not how the verse reads. It says “a gentle tongue could break a bone.” Wow! Think on those words – a gentle tongue can break a bone. I don’t think Solomon really meant the tongue can break an actual bone, but that it has the same power that it takes to break a bone. That is awesome to me. To realize the tool we have in our hands, or rather our mouths, is as powerful as that which breaks bones, makes me awed at the responsibility to speak words that are “aptly spoken fit to be in a setting of silver and gold.”

 

Remember Mom saying, “If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say it at all?” I love the fact that it is right here in Proverbs 30:32. “If you have played the fool and exalted yourself, or if you have planned evil, clap your hand over your mouth!” How I wish I would do that more often. Too often the words come out and I cannot take them back.

 

My Mom, my Godly mentor, had kind words; she generally spoke softly and used her words wisely. In wisdom she rebuked, corrected, instructed, and encouraged. When I was about 12, Mom was teaching the 4 and 5 year old Sunday school class. She told them how kind, compassionate and loving Jesus was. One of her students looked up at her and said, “Are you Jesus?” How powerful for a woman of God to have their spoken words be such that they reflect the kindness and heart of Jesus. My prayer is that as women of God, in this generation, we will display the power of the wise tongue, and its fruit will be life to reflect Jesus, the giver of life.

 

Lois Taylor grew up in a pastor’s family of five children in northern Vermont. She graduated from PCB, now called Cairn University, in Philadelphia, with Bachelor degrees in Bible and social work. She and her husband, Gary, serve at First Baptist Church in Morrisville, PA, where Gary is lead pastor. They will celebrate 38 years of marriage this July. They are blessed with five children ages 23 and up, one daughter-in-law, two sons-in-law, one granddaughter and one expected grandchild. Lois home schooled four of their five children through high school. Their Down syndrome son (23) lives with them, enriching their lives daily. Lois oversees an older brother’s care, while he lives in a nursing home in Vermont, and her 92 year old Dad who lives in Morrisville close to their home. In 2006, Gary and Lois experienced a very traumatic life changing event when their oldest son, a senior in college, suffered an anorexic brain injury due to a heart attack, while playing soccer. Her desire is to help others see that God has given a manual for life in His Word no matter what the situation or circumstances.